This is not the post that I had planned to upload this evening. I had planned a photograph-filled, happy post of the time that Luke and I just spent in Dublin, but after today this is what I want to write about, so write about it I will.

For the past week or so I have been in near constant discomfort because of my IBS, to the point where I was in bed by 7:30pm on our first night in Dublin, because I couldn't bear to walk around, or wear my jeans, anymore. The same pain and discomfort also vey nearly brought on the waterworks yesterday in the airport on the way home, and today in a busy shopping centre. 

Today I went into two separate stores in hunt of something that might help, be it a form of pain-relief or a herbal remedy and I have to say, I left both places thoroughly disheartened and empty-handed. In one I was told to go back to the doctors, and in the other I was told by the store assistant that she strongly believed fruit to be the cause of pain and bloating, because it ferments in the stomach and causes bloating and pain. Now I don't know if this is true or not, but it is certainly NOT. HELPFUL.

Obviously they didn't mean to upset me, but I have found IBS to an unfortunate, vicious cycle. 

Pain/bloating -> anger/frustration -> hyper-sensitivity to all social situations.

I have written about my IBS before, here, and in that post I told you about a couple of things that I had found to be helpful in lessening the symptoms that I felt (bloating, pain, cramping etc.). Recently, though, it's almost as if it's getting worse. Rather than struggling a couple of times a week, it's been every single day. Rather than being cramps and bloating it's been those things and an intense, stabbing pain. I've felt sick and been unable to finish meals, which really, really sucks.

Generally IBS comes in waves, and by that I mean there might be a few weeks of discomfort and then a week or two of no symptoms at all, but this has certainly not been the case for me the past couple of months. I am seriously hoping that this is just an unusually long and bad bout which will clear up and give me a rest for a while soon. Put it this way, if I can't finish my Christmas dinner I will ball my eyes out!

Now I am fully aware that there are worse things out there that I could suffer from, and I also know that the fact that the causes of IBS are still unknown make it a difficult illness (because that's what it is, a chronic illness) to treat. But, as a sufferer, this doesn't help me. I also know that ranting like this online isn't going to do much, but it makes me feel better to get it all out somehow.

Thank you for reading my little rant.

Back to the doctors I go...

Haze x

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We did our entire food shop in Aldi, which meant that we fed 11 people (and could probably have done a couple more) for just £33 - we put in £3 each and enjoyed the cheapest Christmas ever!

Our food included turkey, stuffing, pigs in blankets, Yorkshire puddings, parsnips, cauliflower cheese (there was a long and vicious debate about whether this could be included in a Christmas meal, but it managed to worm it's way in eventually), carrots, runner beans, broccoli and, of course, brussel sprouts. So, as you can tell, no-one was ever going to go hungry!

The Christmas decorations that surround the market this year look great, but my absolute favourite part had to be the Santa. From a balcony, he serenaded us with German versions of Christmas carols and festive classics, everyone joined in with his rendition of 'Can't Help Falling in Love' and he really did put a smile on my face. 

If you're in the area and fancy some street food, there are countless stalls serving everything from snacks and desserts to full blown meals. I will admit that I spent a good while staring enviously at all the people visiting the garlic bread stall, wishing I hadn't already planned to eat dinner at home!